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July 10, 2005
angsty and corny in one entry!
I'm a mess. A big, ugly, reminiscent-of-my-14-year-old-self mess. I've been sick this week. Both the physical kind of sick and the Asperger's kind of sick. Trying to pack for a cross-country move and also trying to figure out how the hell to make this website not so ugly now that I'm using Movable Type after years of claiming tables were the only gods I worshipped not to mention how to make all those LJ people get their butts over here to read while repeatedly debating entering in all my archives versus "starting fresh" hasn't really helped.
Because I wouldn't be me if I didn't harp on the little crap.
But tonight I exercised just a little, and for about 10 minutes, I felt better. That was good. And I ordered boxes for packing, and that was good. And I was a good granddaughter and went out to lunch for my baubie's birthday today, which was... reasonably good. At least it was good for my Guilt Issues.
I'm also really sad right now. I let the last two years really suck out everything good inside me, and I'm sort of at a loss as to where to start to get back to my life. I'm really hoping the move will help me, even though we're going back to a place that wasn't always so good to me. I'm hoping that this time, I'll be able to see Oberlin as a place where I can make good choices instead of seeing it as The Evil College That Sucked Out My Soul (Sometimes).
And if nothing else, I have my new career goals to hang on to, and a really supportive wife who makes my life safe and happy and really full of laughter. And that's very good.
Posted to Mental Health at July 10, 2005 11:53 PM
Comments
i've migrated here! and i can't believe you're going to be in oberlin. where are you guys living?
Posted by: brad at July 12, 2005 01:53 AM
Fairkid, believe it or not... Which is so weird because I was the SRA there for the second half of my junior year. The world is strange.
But at least I'll get to see you sometimes!
Posted by: Rebecca at July 12, 2005 02:01 AM
I think Oberlin will be better when you're not a student. I always liked Oberlin thirty thousand times more when I worked there in the summer and could enjoy the town (which can actually be pretty enjoyable) without being an Oberlin Student-with-a-capital-S. Plus, some of the RDs they've hired over the past couple of years have been really cool, and though they shuffle through there kind of quickly, I'm willing to bet that some of the other people starting with Lauren will be awesome.
Posted by: Kathy at July 12, 2005 11:26 AM
becca tucker is my hero. you'll love her.
Posted by: brad at July 12, 2005 01:02 PM